Laney College Fresh Produce and Unprocessed Food in Bayview Discussion Please help me to editing it.The structure of the sentence and the entire article. Especially at the beginning and the first paragraph, here are my professor’s comments, please follow these changes. The rest can be modified with reference to the teacher’s previous comments on the last two pages.But still require 5-8 sentences per paragraph. Increasing Access to Fresh Produce and Unprocessed Food in Bayview
Poor residents of Bayview district in San Francisco have to deal with insufficient access
to affordable, healthy, and nutritious food and are therefore at a relatively higher risk of
developing long-term health problems. Bayview community organizers should liaise with the
government, relevant organizations, and volunteers, to develop a community gardening initiative
program to improve food landscape in the district.
Establishing community gardens in Bayview is the solution to insufficient access to
affordable, healthy food, as residents will be able to grow their food locally, and reduce the high
dependence on suppliers, supermarkets and grocery stores. Community gardening entails
planting vegetables, flowers or fruits on privately or publicly allotted land (Corrigan and
Michelle 1232). The program should support community members and volunteers who want to
grow their food for home consumption. The successful development of community gardens in
Bayview will mean that residents do not need to rely on travel for long distances in search of
supermarkets or groceries that sell overpriced, sub-standard, or poor quality vegetables.
Community gardening is the best solution for Bayview residents to access fresh,
nutritious food, as the program is easier to develop. There is no precise format required to
establish community gardens as they can be established on the wastelands, reclaimed by
advocates of community and urban gardening who are determined to find a solution for the
insufficient supply of nutritious food in the food deserts (Hendrickson et al. 371). They can also
be established on the natural areas preserved for non-profit community projects in the Bayview
district, or even on government-sponsored street corner beautification areas. Additionally,
community organizers in Bayview can collaborate with a non-profit organization and mobilize
community members to plant vegetables and fruits in their local gardens and plots.
The community association will manage the established gardens, non-profit
organizations, recreation or city park department, school management, or other local landowners.
They will be managed in a grassroots or hierarchical organizational structure. As the name
suggests, community gardens persuade community involvement in a democratic, diverse, and
inclusive fashion. Depending on the type of arrangement that organizers choose, community
members can choose to grow vegetables on individual plots, but share part of the gardening work
in public or common areas (Wang et al. 127). Community gardening will benefit Bayview
residents tangibly in terms of improved access to nutritious food, acquired at a relatively lower
cost and quality than buying from supermarkets and groceries. Residents will also benefit
intangibly as community members will get to share their hobby of growing vegetables, with
others who do the same. It will establish positive relations as community members pull together
towards solving the problem.
The successful development of community gardens in Bayview will reduce healthy foodrelated barriers, including cost, food preference, and transportation. This is significant, mainly
because most of the affected people in the food desert are poor and minorities. Community
gardening will bring many advantages to the neighborhood, including increasing nearby property
value, community engagement, and safety. Residents will also benefit from improved levels of
social capital, enhanced satisfaction as well as neighborhood engagement. Gardening promotes
community activism for increased supply of nutritious, unprocessed food in the district.
Community gardening is a cheaper but more reliable solution to the problem of
inadequate access to healthy unprocessed foods, as it will take advantage of the abandoned
public or private land. Bayview residents will have a chance of producing high yield and highquality foods that are not only nutritious but also substantial in reducing the cost of such meals
for the family. Beyond nutrition but within the health bracket, community gardening will provide
a form of recreation and exercise for the residents, as they participate in the maintenance of the
gardens. Recreation and physical exercise through vigorous garden work will improve the
psychological and physiological health of members (Corrigan and Michelle 1236).
The perfect partner organization that community organizers in Bayview can collaborate
with is the ACGA (American Community Gardening Association), whose mission is to build the
community through enhanced and increased community gardening and greening in the United
States. It is a national association, formed by professionals, supporters, and volunteers of rural
and urban community gardening. The organization recognizes the value of community gardening
in improving the quality of life through enhanced social integration, enhanced self-reliance,
reduced family food budgets, increased recreation opportunities, and most importantly increases
the production of nutritious foods (Hendrickson et al. 374). The American Community
Gardening Association will work with Bayview residents to support and promote the gardening
project in the open public space as well as on individually owned plots. The association will also
support the community gardening project by facilitating gardening information, expanding
gardening network within the state, developing resources that support community gardening,
educational programs, as well as encouraging research related to community gardening.
The local government is also essential in the effective development of community
gardens, as they usually grow out of partnerships between the government, the community, and
non-profit organizations. The government will play the roles of providing public land for setting
up the gardens, as well as enacting policies that protect, promote, and fund community gardens.
The local government can also participate in issuing community land trusts, seedlings
distribution, and water supply and gardening education (Wang et al. 130).
Community gardening can offer an effective solution to the problem of inadequate access
to healthy unprocessed foods in the Bayview district food desert. Community organizers, local
government, volunteers, and relevant non-profit organization should support community
gardening in the district. In addition to the provision of healthy non-processed foods, the
residents will benefit from the reduced cost of food in the family, enhanced recreation, improved
community integration, and ties, as well as a healthy environment, all which are significant in
protecting the residents from long-term health problems.
Works Cited
Corrigan, Michelle P. “Growing what you eat: Developing community gardens in Baltimore,
Maryland.” Applied Geography 31.4 (2011): 1232-1241.
Hendrickson, Deja, Chery Smith, and Nicole Eikenberry. “Fruit and vegetable access in four
low-income food deserts communities in Minnesota.” Agriculture and Human Values23.3
(2006): 371-383.
Wang, Haoluan, Feng Qiu, and Brent Swallow. “Can community gardens and farmers’ markets
relieve food desert problems? A study of Edmonton, Canada. ” Applied Geography 55
(2014): 127-137.
Issue Essay
Consider Your Audience and Purpose
Essay Overview
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Select any pubic issue that disturbs you:
o It may be a small or large scale issue.
o It may be a campus or community issue.
You will direct your writing to someone connected to or even responsible for the issue that disturbs you.
Your purpose is to communicate your concern or displeasure, as well as attempt to persuade the person
responsible to take appropriate action.
You must consider your audience and rely on logos, ethos, and pathos to persuade your readers.
Thesis Statement
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You must have a clearly stated, one sentence, argumentative thesis statement that states:
o Your specific issue
o Your concern regarding it (that you will explain and prove is accurate with your analysis in the
following body paragraphs)
o Who your audience is
o Why your audience should care
Examples:
o All registered voters in the United States must elect officials who will replace the Electoral
College with the Popular Vote, because the Electoral College is undemocratic, it discourages
voting, and it is outdated.
o Due to the rise in health costs resulting in medical bankruptcies, the Affordable Care Act should
be replaced with a free universal health care system, which should be considered a necessity by
the government as it will improve standardized care, create a healthier workforce, and reduce
future social costs.
o Americans who outwardly detest and criticize the LGBTQ community should not hate their nonheterosexual, non-cis-gendered identity because the hatred is mistargeted and uncalled for,
proven by the recent scientific findings on sexuality, the public’s lack of knowledge on queerness,
and the irrelevance of sexuality in everyday life.
o Tip culture in the U.S. has always been exploitative, particularly against people of color and
women; therefore, industry leaders should adopt alternative pay structures which fairly
compensate restaurant workers, enabling them to have bargaining power over their wage
earnings.
o By shutting down the government over border wall funding in an attempt to appeal to his most
extreme followers, the president would plunge federal workers and contractors back into turmoil,
weaken the economy, and cost himself the support of many moderate republicans, who might see
the costs of his actions surpassing the benefits.
Essay Requirements
✓ Each body paragraph must start with a topic sentence that tells readers what that paragraph will
develop/cover (should pertain to your thesis statement).
✓ Each body paragraph should start and end with your thoughts – never research.
✓ A body paragraph should range between five and eight sentences – it should never be a page in length.
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✓ Not only will you include research in your paper, but you must explain, analyze, and comment on each
quote, summary, or paraphrase you incorporate into your essay – your critical thinking!
o AXES:
▪ Assertions – statements which present points of view.
▪ eXamples – specific passages, scenes, events, or items which inspire these points of view.
▪ Explanations – statements which reveal how the examples support and/or complicate the
assertions.
▪ Significance – statements which reveal the importance of the analysis to our personal
and/or cultural concerns.
✓ You will never include research without analyzing it.
✓ You will always need to show readers how or why your analysis is significant.
✓ Your conclusion should not merely function as a summary of your entire essay.
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✓
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✓
You are required to use proper MLA citation format for both in-text citations and a works cited page.
You will not receive credit if you do not follow MLA citation guidelines.
If you plagiarize ANY part of the essay, you will not receive credit.
Must include a minimum of 2 acceptable outside sources (NEVER Wikipedia)
o Academic databases for example
o Use the databases available through the online library:
https://berkeleycitycollege.libguides.com/friendly.php?s=databases
✓ Your final essay must be THREE pages (minimum).
✓ If you do not meet the length requirement, you will not receive credit.
✓ You will upload all drafts and the final paper to turnitin.com.
✓ Your essay will need to score in the GREEN category to receive credit.
✓ Formatting: Times New Roman, 12pt. font, double spaced.
o No extra spacing allowed – at the beginning of the essay or between paragraphs
o No headers or footers
Deadlines
*Potential Issue Topic: Friday, June 21st
* Tentative Thesis Statement: Monday, June 24th
* Essay Draft: Friday, June 28th
* Final Essay: Monday, July 1st
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